March 22, 2015
Dear Rose,
I almost didn't wake up early. I always try to wake up early in the morning because I find that it is the best time to write. Sometimes, I suffer from what we call - writer's block, where the flow of thoughts just doesn't come freely and therefore, there is a dearth of topics to write about. A few weeks ago, before I got this techy thing, I felt tired writing. Writing on a notebook is good. But my hands will never flow as fast as my thoughts do. But at least when I type, it cuts down the time and at least I can just type and type and type on. Thank God for techy stuff huh.
Anyway, it's Sunday today, so I'm assuming that you're up and about and ready to go to church. I'm a bit sad because this is Michelle and Alisha's last day here before they fly off again to Australia. They've been here for about 3.5 months after her dad died. And she's also spent as much time of it in Caryana, with her mom and JP. You've met Alisha haven't you. She is the sweetest, the smartest and the funniest little girl ever. I'm going to miss my Princess. She has been growing by leaps and bounds and at one year and a half, she has been trying to say as many words as she can on a daily basis. Yesterday, she said 'excuse me' which sounded like 'su si' She's wonderful and too cute. I don't know how to describe the joy she brings and more so because Michelle and I have become real best friends, almost like sisters. I hope you have a buddy too that you could trust the same way I do Michelle. It's a friendship that has had it's ups and downs. If there was one person in the whole while world who's been totally supportive about all my dreams - it's her. It's a wonderful thing to have and this is one reason I stay out here.
She and I actually were just talking about you yesterday and how you may not after all, appreciate the fact that I am working to get you out of there. To tell you the truth, it's a half-hearted effort. I want Mona and the other women there to pay the consequences of the atrocious acts done but at the same time, I'd like to respect the fact that some of you may not really want to live outside. I mean really - Again, life out here can be fun but at your age, it really is going to take a lot of adjustment. You'll have to learn how to earn. Before you can earn, you'll have to go through some sort of education - like you may need to take an online course or go to a traditional school to learn a trade. Who'd pay for your course, who'd help you with funds for transportation, with every day expenses for food, lodgings, water and what not. And when you start working, it's never easy. Depending on the type of work you applied for, most times, it's not just going to about you sitting behind a desk and doing paperwork. Not unless if you probably apply at a Call Center. But this is a tough job too. Most people think differently. But that's just them.
Most of those who came out applied there. It doesn't take much education but it also demands a lot from applicants - the work hours, the type of Support you'll be giving - Customer Service, Technical Support, Financial Support, HealthCare Support - and having to deal with all kinds of customers. It's never been easy. The bright side to it, is learning new stuff, getting paid a higher wage compared to the ordinary daily wage - like you can earn from 13 thousand Pesos to 18 thousand pesos, depending on how you speak and the type of Support you'll be rendering. It's really a gamble. You'll have to learn how to stand on your own. Again, remembering what I know of you - you're pretty impulsive - more impulsive than I am. So if I find a certain line of work difficult, I'm tempted to leave. I did that in my past jobs. I left and didn't go back. It's a shame. I got out of working that old and boring routine, but the downside to it is that I didn't' get my final pay each time. So it was like, working for free for a company I didn't like. At least those instances were few and far between. Most of the time, one has just got to grit one's teeth and forge on.
So allow me to write and I hope you'd be able to read it someday. I'll be happy if you are. That's the only thing that really matters to me. Sunday mass over there is about to start. I haven't been to mass in a long, long time. Last Sunday, I attended mass only because I had to attend the christening ceremony of one of my god children, Kiera. But I don't really go to church. I like going on my own - which is rare. I just don't especially when I hear words from the pulpit that aim to put the fear of the Lord in everyone's hearts. My point is that the way to God isn't something scary. There are many and different ways to the Lord as each of us travel our own paths. If we all did, then the Martyrs and the Saints would have lived exactly the same life and end up in Heaven. But that wasn't the case. Some served the Lord and died peacefully. Others served the Lord and were persecuted for it. Others, spent their whole lives helping to convert heathens to Christianity, while others spent their lives serving the poor. There are too many ways to reach out to the Lord. I do it in my own simple way by talking to the Lord in prayer when I remember. Like if I'm on the bus, or I'm the shower….any place is a good place to talk to the Lord. There is no fear of damnation because I know that I haven't done anything wrong. My heart may not be pure most times. What I'm probably aiming at is that the life in there, serving God can also be lived out here. God did say, there is one way to serve him but he didn't specify a place, did he? No. He most certainly did not mention Caryana. So if you wish to be there, I have to learn to accept it. I may not like it but if you're happy, I should be happy for you.
Oh well, the argument for the day ends now.
Enjoy your day okay.
Love,
Marie
Note: Better late than never post.
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